The Internet Is For Porn is a song from Avenue Q.
Singers[]
Lyrics[]
Kate
(spoken)Finally! I get to teach a whole lesson all by myself! And I'm gonna teach something relevant...something modern...the internet! Haha! (singing)The internet is really, really great.
Trekkie:
For porn!
Kate:
I've got a fast connection so I don't have to wait,
Trekkie:
For porn!
Kate:
(spoken)Huh?
There's always some new site,
Trekkie:
For porn!
Kate:
I browse all day and night
Trekkie:
For porn!
Kate:
It's like I'm surfing at the speed of light
Trekkie:
For porn!
Kate:
Trekkie!
Trekkie:
The internet is for porn
Kate:
Trekkie!
Trekkie:
The internet is for porn,
Kate:
What are you doing!?
Trekkie:
Why you think the net was born?
Porn, porn, porn!
Kate:
Trekkie!
Trekkie:
Oh hello Kate Monster!
Kate:
You are ruining my song
Trekkie:
Oh me sorry, me no mean to!
Kate:
Well if you wouldn't mind please being quiet for a minute so I can finish?
Trekkie:
Okidoki.
Kate:
Good
I'm glad we have this new technology
Trekkie:
For porn - oops!
Kate:
Which gives us untold opportunity
Trekkie:
For porn - oops, sorry!
Kate:
Right from your own desktop
Trekkie:
For ---
Kate:
You can research browse and shop
Until you've had enough and your ready to stop.
Trekkie:
FOR PORN!!
Kate Monster:
Trekkie!
Trekkie:
The internet is for porn!
Kate:
Noooo
Trekkie:
The internet is for porn!
Kate:
Trekkie
Trekkie:
Me up all night honking me horn to porn, porn, porn!
Kate:
That's gross! You're a pervert!
Trekkie:
Ah, sticks and stones Kate Monster
Kate:
No really, You're a pervert
Normal people don't sit at home and look at porn on the internet
Trekkie:
Ohhhh?
Kate:
What?!
Trekkie:
You have no idea
Ready normal people?
Brian, Gary, Rod:
Ready--- ready ----ready
Trekkie:
Let me hear it!
Trekkie and guys:
The internet is for porn!
Princeton:
Sorry Kate
Trekkie and guys:
The internet is for porn!
Princeton:
I masturbate!
Trekkie and guys:
All these guys unzip their flies
For porn, porn, porn!
Kate:
The internet is not for porn!!
Trekkie and guys:
PORN!, PORN, P---
Kate:
HOLD ON A SECOND!
Now I happen to know for a fact that you, Rod, check your portfolio and trade stocks online
Rod:
That's correct.
Kate:
And Brian, you buy things on Amazon.com
Brian:
Sure!
Kate:
And Gary, you keep selling your possesions on Ebay
Gary:
Yes I do!
Kate:
And Princeton, you sent me that sweet online birthday card
Princeton:
True!
Trekkie:
Oh, but Kate-
What you think he do...after? Hmm?
Princeton:
...Yeah...
Kate:
EEEWWWWW!
Trekkie and guys:
The internet is for porn!
Kate:
Gross!
Trekkie and guys:
The internet is for porn!
Kate:
I hate porn
Trekkie:
Grab your dick and double click
Kate:
I hate men!
Trekkie and guys:
For porn, porn, porn!
(harmonizing) Porn, porn, porn, porn
Kate:
I'm leaving!
Trekkie and guys:
Porn, porn, porn, porn
porn, porn, porn, porn
Kate:
I hate the internet!
Trekkie and guys:
Porn, porn, porn, porn
Trekkie:
The internet is for...
Trekkie and some:
The internet is for...
Trekkie and all:
The internet is for PORN!
Trekkie:
YEAH!
Trivia[]
- The song is a parody of the Sesame Street song "C Is For Cookie", which is fitting, as Trekkie Monster himself is based off of Cookie Monster.
Song[]
