There Is Life Outside Your Apartment is a song from Avenue Q.
Lyrics[]
Brian
Princeton?
Princeton
Yeah?
Brian
Listen, buddy, nobody's seen ya for two weeks. What's up with that?
Princeton
I went to work for a temp agency, and they fired me for being too depressing on the phone. I maxed out my cards, I'm two months behind in rent. I totally messed up my personal life. Oh, and Brian—I still haven't found my purpose!
Brian
All right. Get off your ass and stop worrying! Everyone's getting together to mess around the city today.
Princeton
Have fun.
Brian
When I say "everyone", that includes you!
(song starts)
There is life outside your apartment
I know it's hard to conceive
But there's life outside your apartment
And you're only gonna see it if you leave
There is cool shit to do,
But it can't come to you
And who knows, dude?
You might even score!
There is life outside your apartment
But you've got to open the door
Princeton
No, thanks. I'm staying in.
Brian
Don't tell me I gotta force you.
Princeton
Sorry!
Brian
All right, everyone! He's resisting!
(Christmas Eve, Trekkie Monster, Gary and Nicky pick Princeton up and drag him outside)
All (except Princeton)
There is life outside...
There is life outside...
There is life outside...
There is life outside your apartment!
There's a pigeon squashed on the street.
Christmas Eve
Eww.
Brian
There's a girl passing by
Nicky
No, I think it's a guy
All (except Princeton)
And a homeless man who only wants to buy something to eat
Sorry! Can't help you!
(they enter the subway)
We could go to the zoo!
Trekkie
Pick up girls at NYU!
Brian
We could sit in the park smoking pot!
Christmas Eve
Or not!
All (except Princeton)
There is life outside your apartment
Princeton
Well, I guess I'll give it a shot!
(gunshot, everyone screams and runs)
All
There is life outside your apartment
I know --
(loud jackhammer, they cover their ears and swear)
There is life outside your apartment
(they look up in horror)
Woman on building
I'm gonna jump!
All
Don't do it!
Woman on building
Okay!
All
There is cool shit to do
But it can't come to you
So come on --
(car screeches to a halt)
Driver
Get out of the way asshole!
Princeton
Fuck you!
All
There is life outside your apartment!
Oh, you never know what's around the bend.
You could win the lotto or make a friend...
(Lucy enters, the guys eye her and turn to Princeton)
Brian, Gary, Nicky and Trekkie
Take her home to see your apartment...
Lucy
Do you want to feel special?
Brian, Gary, Nicky and Trekkie
Special!
Lucy
I can see that you do.
Brian, Gary, Nicky and Trekkie
Ooooh-wah!
Lucy
Well, I can make you feel... special
if you let me feel you.
Brian, Gary, Nicky and Trekkie
She'll feel you!
Lucy
Where's your pad?
Princeton
Not too far!
Brian, Gary, Nicky and Trekkie
We could call you a car!
Princeton
We'll be fine, thank you! See ya!
Christmas Eve
Hope you don't get gonorrhea!
All
There's life outside your apartment...
Princeton and Lucy
But now it's time to go home!
All (except Princeton and Lucy)
There is life outside your apartment...
Princeton
It's time to go home!
All (except Princeton and Lucy)
There is life outside your apartment...
Lucy
I can make you feel special...
All (except Princeton and Lucy)
There is life outside your apartment...
All
But now it's time to go home!
Trekkie
For porn!
Song[]
